I’ve Hit a Wall. Help!

When I began this blog, I intended to focus on the psychological effects of the economic downturn, and to provide tools for the stress the roiling markets produced.  Who would have guessed just how often I’d get requests for advice on how to manage the therapeutic alliance!  How to get your therapist to like you.  How to get your therapist to love you.  How to leave your therapist.  How to make sure you don’t have to leave your therapist.  How to handle it when your therapist leaves you.

But one of the biggest surprises of all is just how often the search that brings someone to my blog is “How to mess with my therapist’s head.”  I admit I am stymied.  Why in the world would anyone want to do that?  Why spend your money and your time supposedly seeking treatment from a professional when what you really want to do is pull one over on him or her?  Assuming you’re in a bona fide psychotherapy, which you pay for with your hard-earned time, money and commitment to self-disclosure, isn’t it a waste to focus on subterfuge, misleading your therapist, playing games, even vengeance?

Help me out here:  what, exactly, is this all about?  And why are so many people interested in how to do the best job undermining the very therapist they pay to help them?  Any thoughts would be most appreciated.  There’s clearly something here for me to learn!

Copyright © 2012 Marlin S. Potash. All rights reserved.

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One response to “I’ve Hit a Wall. Help!

  1. I think the reason people desire to “mess with” their therapist’s mind is to re-balance an inherently unbalanced relationship. Therapists are human, but in some ways during a session they become like a higher power, having authority, poking and proding your mind into sensitve areas. Naturally, some people want to re-balance this relationship by doing the same to the therapist, finding his or her triggers or weaknesses, so that there is not so much vulnerability as the client. It’s shifting the focus from the vulnerable client to what’s wrong with my therapist. Or “see, you don’t do it any better either?” Of course it’s counter productive. I think it just shows how strong the wound of power misuse can be for some people.

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